Remembering one year ago

Justin's parents came up to watch the dog and wait for Jade's arrival. We went to Village Inn to eat, I picked that place because I was pretty sure I was going to puke sometime during the birth and was not to concerned about ever going back there. As we drove to the hospital we talked about names, and it was the first time I truly felt happy and hopeful that we were going to bring home a living child. We checked in at 8pm to the hospital. Of course I packed lots of bags. They started the drugs, then gave me a some sleeping pills, which worked for a few hours. My sister Jenny and Justin slept on and off during the night. As the morning came, the contractions seemed to be getting stronger and stronger. I lasted to around noon, and then decided to get the epidural. I was terrified of getting one after what happened with the last epidural with the twins. It was great. . we actually took an afternoon nap watched some DVD's, until they broke my water around 4pm. I started pushing at 8pm, around 7pm her heart rate was fluctuating so they put a monitor in her head (I know it sounds horrible) and one inside me too. Finally at the very end the doctor told me she had to come out this time because of her heart rate dropping.

At 8:49pm, I heard her cry for the first time. It was the best sound I have ever heard. Then they took her to the warming thing, she was very blue. We did not get to hold her for almost 30 minutes as she received oxygen, heat and was cleaned up. I could hear her crying so I thought she will be okay. For a few minutes, I was so scared. It was at 9:20pm the first time I got to hold her. I had asked Justin if I could hold her first, he held twins first and I really wanted to be the first one to hold Jade. I don't think I will ever forget that moment. Everything we had been through in the last 7 years to get her seemed a distant memory for a moment. Of course I wanted to stay up all night, and Justin was so tired. I just watched her all night, it was so scary at first not knowing what to do.

That was the night my prayers were answered and I am became a mom to lemon drop. What a year. . . I am so thankful.